TWAS THE NIGHT BEFORE CHRISTMAS & ALL THROUGH THE LAND

‘TWAS THE NIGHT BEFORE CHRISTMAS & ALL THROUGH THE LAND’

TWAS THE NIGHT BEFORE CHRISTMAS AND ALL THROUGH THE LAND-
THE TAX SLAVES WERE LONELY & DEPRESSED, FAMILY GATHERINGS HAD BEEN BANNED-
THE MANTAL BY THE CHIMNEY WAS COLD, HARSH AND BARE-
THE GOVERNMENT HAS DECLARED SAINT NICK WOULD NOT BE ALLOWED TO BE THERE-

THE CHILDREN HAD BEEN CRYING, BANISHED TO THEIR FORBIDDING BEDS-
BECAUSE OF THREATS BY POLITICIANS TO THE PARENTS OR ELSE IT WOULD BE THEIR HEADS-
MAMA WAS WEEPING INTO HER KERCHIEF AS I PUT ON MY CAP-
WE SAT SIX FEET APART, TRYING TO TAKE A SHORT NAP-

WHEN OUT ON THE LAWN THERE AROSE SUCH CLATTER-
I JUPMED UP TO SEE WHAT WAS THE MATTER-
AWAY TO THE WINDOW I FLEW LIKE A FLASH-
TORE OPEN THE SHUTTERS AND THREW UP THE SASH-

THE MOON ON THE BREAST OF THE NEW-FALLEN SNOW-
GAVE THE LUSTER OF MID-DAY TO OBJECTS BELOW-
WHEN, WHAT TO MY WONDERING EYE SHOULD APPEAR-
BUT COVID-19 POLICE EACH WITH A DEMONIC LEER-

THEIR DOUGHNUT FAT JIGGLED AS THEY TRIED TO RUN QUICK-
ONE WADDLED TO THE WINDOW, WITH THE BUTT OF HIS ASSULT RIFLE GAVE IT A LICK-
THROUGH THE SHATTERED WINDOW THE TEAR GAS CANISTERS THEY CAME-
AS I AS I RAN OUT OF FOUR LETTER WORDS I HEARD HIM CALL HIS GOONS BY NAME-

NOW BILLY BOB, NOW JIM BOB, NOW BOBBY JOE & SLIM-
ON, BILLY JOE! ON ROBERT BOB AND BOBBY JIM-
TO THE TOP OF THE PORCH, TO THE TOP OF THE WALL!
NOW BUST THE DOOR DOWN, DASH IN DASH IN ALL!

THEN IN A TWINKLING I HEARD ON THE ROOF-
A CRASHING SOUND AS A TEAR GAS CANISTER DROPPED AND WENT POOF-
AS I COUGHED CRIED AND TRIED TO TURN AROUND-
THREE COVID RULE ENFORCERS WERE ON ME IN A BOUND-

THEY WERE DRESSED IN RIOT GEAR FROM HEAD TO FOOT-
ONE SLAMED THE HANDCUFFS ON ME AS THE OTHER TWO THREATENED TO SHOOT-
ONE KICKED MY FEET FROM UNDER ME AND SLAMMED ME ONTO MY BACK-
THEN THREATENED WITH HIS FOOT MY FAMILY JEWELS TO RACK-

HIS EYES WERE DANCING WITH SADISTIC GLEE-
AS HE DROPPED HIS LARD ASS ON MY BELLY WITH HIS KNEE-
HIS LIPS WERE DRAWN UP IN A LEER, WHILE HIS JOWELS HUNG LOW-
HIS SPITTLE SHOWERED ME AS HE DEMANDED WHY I HAD A LIT CHRISTMAS TREE TO KNOW-

A FOWL ODER CAME FROM THE GREEN STUBS OF ROTTING TEETH-
I FOUGHT TO BREATH AS HIS FAT SMOTHERED ME BENEATH-
HE HAD A POT MARKED FACE AND A BIG FAT BELLY-
WHICH AS HE TOOK BREATHS DANCED LIKE A BOWL FULL OF JELLY-

ACCROSS THE ROOM I COULD HEAR MY WIFE’S DISTRESSED WAIL-
AS TWO GOONS SHOT HER WITH BEAN BAGS SO THAT SHE FELL-
THE HEAD GOON SAID IF WE MOVED, WE WOULD BE DEAD-
I LOOKED AT HIS POWER HUNGRY FACE WITH DREAD-

HE ISSUED CITATIONS FOR NO MASK TWO THOUSAND DOLLARS EACH-
AS I CUSSED HIM FOR A PUBLIC TEAT HANGING LEECH-
ANOTHER TWO THOUSAND DOLLAR FINE WAS GIVEN TO ME-
FOR HAVING UNAUTHORIZED LIT LIGHTS IN THE CHRISTMAS TREE-

THEY LEFT LEAVING A HOLE IN THE ROOF, SHATTERED WINDOW AND DOOR-
LOOKING AT BROKEN DISHES AND FURNITURE I PICKED MYSELF OFF THE FLOOR-
THE WINTER WIND BLEW THOUGH THE HOUSE LIKE A FREIGHT TRAIN-
AS MAMMA AND I COMFORTED THE TRAUMATIZED CHILDREN, BRUSED AND IN PAIN-

TO HIS COVID ENFORCERS HE GAVE A WHISTLE-
JUMPING IN THEIR ARMORED ASSULT VEHICLE THEY DROVE AWAY AS SLICK AS THE DOWN OF A THISLE-
BUT I HEARD HIM EXCLAIM, ERE HE DROVE OUT OF SIGHT-
PUT THE MASK ON OR WE’LL BE BACK AGAIN TOMORROW NIGHT!

The Ole Dog!

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